A new day

Aren't you glad we get to start a new day every day?  And that we get a chance to work on things and try to be better people?

Yesterday after my onc appt was rough, I won't lie.  My little guy was testing, testing, testing and by the time Eric walked in the door, I was done.  I cried and cooked dinner.  I drank two very strong amaretto sours (tall glass, whooooo!).  I calmed down and chilled out.  After dinner I ignored the world and did some sewing (and continued drinking).  I browsed through my new VegNews magazine.  I laid down and read with Reese.  Eli and I talked about how tomorrow is a new day and we both can start over.

This morning I woke up and a thought popped into my head.  Life is going to throw stuff at us, big stuff, small stuff.  I can't control that.  What I can control is my attitude and my choices.  One of the people on colonclub who I greatly admire for her strength has a signature that goes something like this:  You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.  Isn't that a great way to put things?  It's so true.  This is an imperfect world full of imperfect circumstances.  I can pitch a fit and booze it up like I did last night, or I can choose to do something different with my time and energy.

I'm not saying that I don't have emotions about what is happening.  There are a shit ton of emotions, I guarantee you.  And that's okay.  I'm allowed to grieve the circumstances I find myself in.  It's perfectly all right for me to be pissed off about this situation.  But what is my choice about my attitude going to be?

I am not going to let this get me down.  I will use my energy to fight to be here for my husband and my children.  I'm going to rock on with life.

I very much appreciate all the kind words and virtual hugs yesterday.  They were needed muchly.

Today is another day!