I get into funks, you know, where I just want to hide all day long. I look around and see things that need to be done and I can't seem to bring myself to do them. Simple things, like deleting emails, seem like climbing a mountain. I'm starting to remind myself of those hokey depression commercials where the cloud follows the lady (it's always a lady too, isn't it??) or she falls into a hole or whatever. I also have a headache which is most likely due to staying up too late last night reading a Dean Koontz book. Today is just one of those days when I'm feeling sorry for myself and pouting.
Things are going well, honestly. There is a medical plan, at least until September and another scan. Eric is taking us to the beach at the end of the month. I'm busily planning our homeschool year, buying books and thinking about schedules and routines. Yesterday I put a couple Lego sets together with Eli, and this weekend I'm going to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Pt 2. I have awesome friends and a cool family. I found a really neat recipe for Salsa Verde Burgers with Avocado Mayo, and I got FOUR new cookbooks for my birthday.
I think the thing that sucks the most about cancer is the shadow of it covers your whole life. Sometimes the shadow is heavier than other times, but even if it's light, it's still always there. Maybe the best I can do is keep taking care of myself. I should start yoga again, I've been a yoga slacker.
I don't know.
But for today, there is cleaning to be done (I'm lookin' at you, homeschool shelves). Homeschool books to buy. Sewing is waiting for me too. I'm not sure what will help me out of this funk, but I'll keep on keepin' on.
Hey Sheri,
ReplyDeleteMy name is Liz and I came across your blog sometime ago. I am sorry to learn that you are feeling tiered. I hope it passes rather soon and that you will be feeling better and happier. I hope it's not to late to wish you a really great 34th year were cancer will be beaten and you will bring in your 35th in full throttle and health.
That said, since your blog is a great resource for someone going through cancer I wanted to reach out to you to see if you were interested in a new online social support network (that I am the community manager of!) called I Had Cancer. It is a new and free social support network focused on connecting people based on experiences with cancer so that they can easily communicate with one another and share information. I would love to tell you more if you are interested, so please let me know! Because I was so struck by your writing I would love to send you an early-access pass with extra invites for others you may know going through this journey.
Either way, thank you so much for your writing. Take care and best regards.
-Liz@ihadcancer.com
If anyone would like info on I Had Cancer please email me.
and Julie said.... Sheri, I think I can understand how you are feeling. But just know you are not alone when it comes to the funks. I thought my age had something to do with it, but I think everyone gets the funks at times. Life is hard, and you are dealing with a difficult situation. You handle things better than most people do. I am hoping and praying that year 35 will be the year that you are done with Cancer for good. Just know that your Mom is by your side every day, thinking about you and hoping for the very best!!! We love you so much!! And please if you need anything at all just call. Don't feel like you are imposing in any way. You are not a needy person. You are not afraid to give to others and that is a wonderful attribute to have. I love that you are teaching your kids that also. I love you!!! Love Mom and Dad
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