Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Ugh, Scheduling

Scheduling with a cancer center (ANY cancer center) drives me crazy.  I had an appt with my doc at UT Southwestern scheduled for tomorrow.  Today (less than 24 hours before my appt...) I got a call that I'll have to move that back a week because I can't start the trial until it's been 4 weeks since my last chemo.  4 weeks exactly is on Thursday.  ONE FREAKING DAY. 

So.  I wait a week, and see the doctor next Wednesday.

One of the big lessons I've learned on this cancer journey is that I cannot control all the things.  Most of the time, as it turns out, I cannot control any of the things.  Scheduling has been a complete bummer for me 95% of the time.  I resent how much time appointments take.  I get irritated when apopointments are cancelled without notice, set up without notice, or switched around without notice.  And if I have to go to a cancer center more than once a week?  Forget about it.

Deep breath, calming breath.

In the large scheme of things, it isn't a big deal.  I was able to cancel the sitter for the kids, get childcare set up for next week.  Now I have an extra day to clean my house.  Um, yay?

Another chemo free weekend...that's definitely a plus.

I also don't have to run over to Baylor today to get the CD with my scan pics until Thursday, when I will be there anyway.  The kids would rather go to the pool today, which is what we're going to do right now.

I know in my rational mind that things don't always happen in my time.  Please pray that I could be more accepting of that.

5 comments:

  1. I feel for you I hate how long things take sometimes even the realization of the fact that you can't control anything about it doesn't seem to help and it's even worse when you have a serious condition like cancer. anyways I hope things get better for you.

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  2. Oh, Sheri! This post hit me right in the face. I am the world's worst when it comes to patience. I have none. I pray about it but when it comes to actually acting it out I get super anxious and end up having a melt down. I hate anxiety attacks.

    I pray for you every day now I know to add acceptance. I'm really sorry they moved your appointment. For a cancer patient a week is a really big deal. Big hugs!

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  3. It's hard to be accepting of the lack of control. Really hard. You just do what you can and leave the rest to God. Sounds like you're doing that, so go you.

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  4. People say the Serenity prayer but you live it for real. God bless you and keep you lovely lady !

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  5. Sheri, you're on my mind all the time these days. Your grace and composure in the face of this new challenge is so beautiful. I know how terribly hard it is to be faced with a delay when you want with every fiber of your being to GET ON WITH IT. *sigh* I'm glad that you've been able to think about some of the good things you can enjoy in the mean time. I hope you're getting lots of loving time in with those beautiful kids. Sending hugs and healing vibes.

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