After driving past it a few times, I arrived at UT this morning for my 8:45am lab/9:30am doc appt. It all took SO LONG.
The lab didn't know if I needed a urine sample. I hate those things. Every single time I pee all over my hand.
While I was waiting for my doc, a nurse I didn't know came in to ask about my pain. She was in the room for about three minutes, then left.
The doc went over all the dates of my diagnosis/surgery/chemo/etc. Again. Lame. He did, however, approve me for the trial.
After that I met with the research coordinator, and that was one big wait fest. The longest part of the wait? A freaking pregnancy test. And they must have used a real rabbit because it took forever. Guess what? I'm NOT freaking pregnant!
Finally I had a little meeting with the research coordinator and the pharmacist. The pharmacist told me all the stuff the coordinator told me the last time I was there. By this time it was something like 1:30pm and what in the world was I STILL doing there??
Anyway, I got my pills. I'm waffling between this being a good thing and a terrible thing. Yes, yes, I realize what an awesome opportunity this trial is. On the way home today I cried and cried though because it's just more poison that is probably going to make me feel crappy. I don't want to take poison pills that will make me feel crappy and have sore hands and feet.
I took my first dose a little while ago. Sigh.
This verse popped up in my Daily Bible ap:
James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
Please pray that I can find the joy in this trial, and all the trials I come up against. And now I'm going to spend some time goofing off with my kids.
Sheri,
ReplyDeleteMaybe this drug trial is the answer to many prayers. I know that you get impatient with how long it takes for appointments. Just know that you may be meeting with all of those people for a reason. You never know how something you say,or a look, may make a difference in someone else's life. I think about that all the time when I meet someone new, or spend time with the residents at work. I have been thinking about you all day! I will keep praying for healing, a miracle!!! Love, Mom
Enjoy your 'ok' time with the kids. Hope this doesn't affect you too much. Pity about all the wasted time though, every extra second waiting there means a second taken from some other opportunity. Keep the faith...
ReplyDeleteSheri, I hope so deeply that regorafenib will work for you. It's showed such promising results so far. And while I can only begin to imagine what you're feeling, I understand some of it - the hesitance to start subjecting yourself to what chemo can do all over again, the worries about your kids and your precious time. Whatever happens, know that your participation in this study is helping to save lives somewhere down the road, and all the people who will be that much closer to a cure because of you are forever in your debt.
ReplyDeleteI wish you peace and comfort as you begin this part of your journey.
--Beth
I agree with everything you've said and all the comments posted so far. I hate that you're having to go through this. It does suck to the highest point of suckdom, if there's such a place but I'm so glad that you were accepted into the clinical trial because it gives you such hope and may very well be the cure. Those were the thoughts I had when entering my clinical trial with Xeloda. In the end, I did it for my granddaughter (and now I've been blessed with three of them)!
ReplyDeleteSheri, a link popped up on my Facebook page today from the Colon Cancer Alliance: . Thought I'd pass along because it might help.
ReplyDeleteThe link didn't go through and I don't know why. http://mycrcconnections.ning.com/forum/topics/regorafenib-patients-would-you-like-to-share-your-experiences
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