I'm Sorry for Cursing - Colon / rectal cancer

I was all ready to post a huge rant about all the crappy things and feelings I have been having for the past couple of days.  The 2-3 days before chemo are sucktastic, and you almost got to hear about it.  Then I stopped.  I took Reese to her art class.  Eli and I got some snacks and sat outside (because it was in the 60s today, yo).  I looked up at the clouds in the sky.  I remembered something I read recently, that doubts and fears and sadness come from the evil in the world.  Maybe this is hokey, but picture a little devil on my shoulder trying his hardest to make me forget all the good things that are happening in my life.    While I was sitting outside gazing at the clouds, I took a deep breath and realized once again that I am not alone in my struggles.  All I have to do is ask, and I can feel the peace and calm.

So now I have my head on straight.  My priorities have been switched around.  Do I want to go to chemo tomorrow?  Uh.  NO.  But you know what?  I can do all things through God who strengthens me.  And I am relieved because of that.

Did I mention that my next CT scan is scheduled?  January 25th, it is your lucky day!  Whoohooo!

Since I do have chemo tomorrow, I have a few more things to attend to tonight.  After that, I plan to relax with my children and try to stay awake so I can get a big hug and a kiss from my husband. 

Prayers welcome and appreciated!!!