There's not a whole lot going on with my ass wound these days. Eric is kind enough to change the gauze three times a day, and I just go about my business. But today I went to the wound care clinic to have the nurse take a look.
She measured 1.5cm long, and 3.5cm deep. I questioned the depth because it seems to vary depending on who is doing the measuring. One of the nurses did mention that the inside of the wound is spongy, so if the measurer presses too much, the depth will be, well, deeper. Healing, however, is happening! That's good news, yo. I would very much like to NOT have an open wound on my rectal area someday.
I feel good these days. Really good. Definitely better than I felt during radiation and chemo. Infinitely better than I felt a couple weeks after surgery. My ass doesn't hurt all the time anymore. I'm not all hopped up on oxycodone (okay, I miss that a teensy tiny bit). I still get tired, but absolutely nothing like I did during chemo. The kids and I are getting out of the house and attending groups and playdates. Everyone is a lot happier, I think. Reese has said a couple times that she's glad I'm not sick anymore because she likes going places.
I don't know, I just feel different. I feel like I need to grab hold of things, of experiences, spend time with friends. I've always leaned towards the positive, but I'm finding myself seeing the great things even in shitty circumstances. Maybe it's the Post Chemo High, wherein I'm so so very glad to be done that everything else is just good. Maybe it's a change forever. I suppose we shall see. I do know that I'm thankful for this life I've been given. Whatever happens in the future, I'm glad for right now.